Thursday, June 7, 2012

Fortunate Conversation

A couple of nights ago, I had a conversation with a boy who was my son's age while he was waiting for his sister to finish up her softball game, along with my daughter.  I was talking with his mother when he came over to her and sat on her lap.  Why is this a big deal?  I often wonder how a conversation would go with my own son.  He is verbal and we are working on his circles of communication but this little conversation has made an impact on me.

'Charlie' came over to his mother and hopped on her lap.  He is the same age, height and looks like the same weight as my son.  He then started playing with her hair.  My son plays with my hair.  He wouldn't sit still on her lap.  My son hardly ever sits still.  He started rocking back and forth and being impatient.  Same with my son.  Then I started asking 'Charlie' some questions about school and boy was he was ready to talk.  We talked about his favorite subject...gym class.  Then he went on to tell me all about the fun games they play in gym with one game going into lots of detail.  I could tell it was his absolute favorite.  I'm pretty sure my son dislikes gym class, but again, that is a guess.  He usually gets mad at his teachers when it is time for gym.  Then 'Charlie' and I talked about what he didn't like to do in school...read.  He really disliked reading. Then 'Charlie' and his mom talked a little bit more about his reading teacher.  We've been trying, desperately, to get my son to read, memorize sight words, you name it.  Then I asked what he liked to do outside of school.  'Charlie' really enjoyed being in Boy Scouts.  He then went on and on, telling me all about it.  He also liked to play baseball.  He also told me all about his friends.  My son goes to multiple therapies.  He is not involved in any sports, or groups, and as far as I know, he doesn't have any friends.

After the softball game was over, I thanked his mom for letting me speak with him.  She gave me a puzzled look.  I then told her that my son had autism and I never had a conversation like that with him.  She just smiled and said nothing.  Her response was perfect.  I felt very fortunate to have this little conversation with this boy and hoping that one day, I will have a similar conversation with my own son.

This is what we have to keep doing.

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